February 18, 2011

petnames

i have nicknamed almost every guy i ever crushed on, hooked up with or dated. only for use when talking with friends. only one of my boyfriends ever gave me a petname. i used my first petname with the guy i dated before J. and i still kick myself for it

D and i dated my freshman year of college. he was my rebound; it only lasted two months. it was a fun two months, but i knew it was nearing its end the day he said he thought he might be falling in love with me. i panicked. he was a super sweet guy who i probably could've fallen for. but i wasn't over my ex and knew i'd only end up hurting D. so i broke up with him. in the parking lot of my dorm building. i'm a bitch... we sorta rekindled our friendship/relationship months later. that also turned out poorly, and i wound up writing a passive aggressive post about him on my old livejournal. i'm still a bitch. i actually favorited the post response he wrote about me because he called me an "ice queen of a bitch". it was kinda true... i used to miss him because he was a great person. then i missed him because i never apologized for being so horrible to him. i still remember some of the silly things he used to say when we were together/still talking. one of those things is his silly petname for me: kitten. short for sex kitten. because i was apparently that sexy

i met P at the beginning of 2009, and we dated for nine months. at some point, i started calling him honeybear. everything about our relationship was big and fast. i kept saying it could explode at any moment, only partially believing it. too bad i was right. that much intensity can't last. i thought i loved him, but love doesn't make you doubt yourself every moment of every day. a text and two phone calls later, we were broken up, and i was sobbing in the parking lot of my office building. classy. bear was so fitting for him. he mauled anything in his path that threatened him. i used to tell him "i don't want to talk to you when you're being a grizzly bear" because bear was the key. i should've known better, but i'd lost myself. and i ruined a great petname in the process

J has a petname. i'm rather fond of it, but sometimes i think honeybear would be more fitting. not because he's a raging asshole like P, but because he's big and snuggly like a pooh bear. however, i refuse to recycle petnames because of the memories (good and bad) associated with it. J doesn't have a petname for me, but a tiny piece of me thinks he would probably use kitten. partially for the sex kitten reference. partially because i'm so cat like sometimes (and he's a closet cat lady ;)). i'm always nuzzling up to him, marking him as mine. but i think it'd make me uncomfortable to hear it from him, reminding me too much of D. i don't particularly mind not having a petname as i still love my own name; i just find it interesting

do you have a petname for your significant other? have you recycled a name?

1 comment:

  1. I've never thought anything about my petname. My wife name me Jeanmiche. I find it rather lovely.

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